Lifestyle BDSM

“From the first time I saw you, I’ve belonged to you completely.”

-Cassandra Clare

Definition

Those who engage in a 24/7 lifestyle BDSM relationship are couples (or groups of people) who don’t see any distinction in between real life and play. For them BDSM goes beyond the few hours that a fun session might take place, and their devotion to their masters and mistresses is taken quite seriously. To get into a 24/7 lifestyle relationship is a pretty big decision for anyone, but then again, what kind of commitment isn’t? Sometimes the subs in these types of relationships consider themselves slaves, but each relationship is different and has different titles and rules.

Contracts

When entering a 24/7 lifestyle BDSM relationship, many couples enjoy having a contract. This is a document which will state the rules of the relationship and, especially when starting out, a time frame to test out the stipulation of the contract. Of course these documents are not legally binding and any reasonable person would allow anything in it that is just not working to be changed, but for some people the idea that such a contract would be binding is very scintillating and makes them feel truly submissive (or dominant).

Collaring

When a submissive enters into a lifestyle relationship, often times they will wear a collar to signify that they are owned. Collars range from bulky things that actually lock, to delicate necklaces that are more symbolic. These are not much different than engagement rings and wedding bands that non-fetish couples use to signify that they are taken or not. The downside to a more fetish-oriented collar is that it would prevent a person from flying under the radar at work or with other family members, so some players have two collars – one for private play and another for everyday life.

The Day to Day

The daily life of a lifestyle BDSM couple might not seem that exciting, but there are small things which make it so for the couple involved. This could mean the sub rubs their top’s feet at the end of the day, or a special sleeping arrangement with the sub at the foot of the bed or on the floor. It could also mean the sub walks around naked when at home, or wears special garments specified by the dominant. Every couple with a 24/7 lifestyle relationship has different tastes, so their day to day life can look starkly different from other lifestyle BDSM couples.

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