“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful.”-Ralph Waldo Emerson
A service submissive is one who truly gets off on doing things for their Dom. This can even be a non-sexual thing like running errands for them and making sure they have their dinner when they come home from work. In this type of relationship, the sub really makes their whole life about trying to help the Dom reach their goals. It can be highly related to the nostalgia fetish in which people return to the traditional family style with a submissive wife who serves the husband. However, outside of that specific fetish, service submissives can be men too.
Good Service Is Always On
While BDSM play is great, being a service submissive is about so much more than just a play session or a fun night out at a play party. It is about doing everything you can to make your Dom’s life better. This type of relationship should not be embarked upon lightly. It’s the kind of things that requires a lot of thought, and perhaps a collaring ceremony or slave contract to make sure that everyone gets what they need and want at the end of the day. Besides being of sexual service, a sub of this nature could even help a Dom at work, or provide the simple service of being a conversational partner who is always with advice and support.
Finding the Diamond in the Rough
It is really hard to find a true service submissive, but if you look long and hard enough, they are out there. You can often find them on kink specific dating sites. However, if you’re already in a relationship, don’t despair. You can often bring this type of kinkiness into a relationship because it can range from gentle and vanilla to extreme. It’s best to bring it in as a sexual idea at first, and then see how your partner enjoys it. Once you’ve established that they like to be sub and you like to be Dom, suggest other ways they can help you. You may be surprised how many people get off on make someone else feel good while improving their own lot in life as a result.